I wouldn't exactly call myself clumsy, but I do happen to trip/fall fairly often. Luckily, most of it is done in the privacy of my own home with only Bella to witness. The other times, I seem to trip mostly on dates. How fortunate. Falling down is the most embarrassing/hysterical thing ever. It's impossible to not laugh at someone falling down. I'm laughing now just thinking about it. Which is probably why I fall down all the time. Karma is a real asshole.
I remember meeting my high school boyfriend's family for the first time. Of course I was a little nervous, you never know what to expect when you first meet parents. Everything seemed to go well until it was time for me to go home and I fell down the outside stairs. To make matters worse, it had been raining so my jeans got soaked and dirty. At least I was on my way out so I could go straight to my car and deal with my humiliation. It really wasn't my fault though, who has a brick missing from their front stoop and doesn't replace it??
The first time I went out out with another boyfriend and his friends I bit it even worse. We had gone out for his birthday to Shout and I was making a conscience effort to leave a good impression with his friends the whole night. Mission accomplished. Until... we were leaving and walking to get a cab and I fell so hard. If you've ever been to Shout, you know that after leaving the restaurant, there aren't any weird stairs or possible trip hazards. I'm not really sure what happened. I know that there were a lot of people sitting outside on the benches that definitely didn't try to contain their laughter and my date did the "are you OK?" which is the worst because it's an "I'm concerned you might be hurt, so I'm trying not laugh"/ "if you aren't hurt I want to laugh so hard but don't want to hurt your feelings" tone. I got up in ninja speed but it was still pretty bad, I scraped my hand on the concrete and had imprints from those tiny little rocks that come out of nowhere on my palms and knees. Like a real first-grader. It's definitely safe to say I lost some cool points there.
One time while walking through the parking lot to Wild Bills (and trying to be extra cute) with one of my girlfriends I fell off the side of one of my wedge shoes and hit the ground super hard. I was able to laugh it off while my friend was hysterical, not noticing the blood dripping down my leg until some guy was like, "uh, are you OK?" while pointing to my knee. I just had to wear shorts that night.
On one of my more recent birthdays (the age isn't important) while dancing on a stage at CosmoLava I slipped on a lemon peel and fell. You didn't read that wrong, I slipped on a lemon peel. I think that one was alcohol related, and I don't remember being in pain but nevertheless, it still happened.
In middle school, I ran into a glass door at Space Camp. As if being at Space Camp isn't bad enough (so to C, I'm sorry I laughed at you for walking into the glass door at your grandmothers, I clearly blocked out a similar experience and mine was worse).
After leaving a packed Hawks game at Philips Arena with my friend Tiana some years ago I fell outside in front of everyone. I feel like I deserved that one because I was wearing ridiculously high heels and my attire was not what one would normally wear to a sporting event. In other words, I was that girl.
I trip up the stairs all the time. Thankfully, no one ever sees those misfortunes. I usually get pissed before laughing at myself, though. I'll say a few expletives, possibly hit/kick something nearby in a rage and then laugh at myself for 1), falling and 2), having such a fit of rage/freak out. The other day I was walking downstairs and somehow my heel got caught on one of the stairs causing my body to continue moving downstairs while my feet were firmly planted. I was able to catch myself before face planting but would have been livid if I broke my shoe and/or face.
I don't think it's possible to ever fall down and not be embarrassed. Although I have mastered the art of "laughing it off" even if the tears are really from physical pain.
